For most people the question "how many children do you have?" Is an easy answer. When I am asked that question I cringe inside. I always answer 2. If I have recently met someone and they ask about my children how can I answer 3? Then I would have to tell everyone I met this painful very personal story.
Every time I answer 2 I get this heartbreaking pain in the pit of my stomach. I feel like I am not being fair to him. Like I am hurting him somehow. I start getting anxious and feel insecure. I actually started writing this post a couple weeks ago and since then I watched a google hangout with a group of amazing women. they talked about this subject and how they answer this question. One lady said that she always answers with the word living. I have been thinking about trying this. when someone asks me I will say "I have two living children" this lets them know that I have more children and that at some point for some reason they are not longer living. It doesn't require a long explanation or an awkward moment while they try and figure out where my third child is. I don't know about everyone but I don't just share my story with anyone. It isn't "casual conversation" I heard someone say that and I loved it. It perfectly describes how I feel on the subject. The death of my son isn't casual conversation, It is heart breaking and painful every time I talk about it.
Just a little food for thought: next time you ask someone how many children they have, realize that for some people that is an awful question and answering it isn't as easy and saying a number.
No comments:
Post a Comment